By Dr. Selwyn R. Cudjoe
October 23, 2017
Last week my friend Prime Minister Keith Rowley was at it again, demeaning women without having a clue about what he is doing to their mental health, their self-esteem and lowering their respect in the eyes of the nation. No one in the party seems to have the courage to tell the PM that his views on women are antiquated. What struck me most about Camille Robinson-Regis’s defense of the PM’s analogy of the grooming of women to the grooming of a golf course was her unconscious ability to participate in demeaning herself as a woman and a mother when she suggested there are more important things the nation should focus upon.
Today I reproduce parts of my article “Confessions of a Soft Man” (Express, April 12, 2014). It is not meant to critique a woman when a man is the major offender nor does it wish to jump on any bandwagon criticizing the prime minister. Rather, it reflects my long-standing concerns about maintaining the dignity of women:
“Let me confess to my eternal shame that I am a soft man. After my prostatectomy (an operation for prostate cancer) about six years ago [in 2008], I am sure that I can never win any titles for possessing the hardest hard which some of our calypsonians, promoters of this kind of wisdom, proclaim is the true sign of a real man.
“Let us then congratulate Keith Rowley, a man of steel, whose steel-like prowess, as Camille Robinson-Regis, a deputy leader of the PNM, assures us will allow him to lead the nation aright. According to the Express, Ms. Robinson-Regis assured the nation, at a meeting of the PNM Women’s League, that although Anil Roberts likes to shout, at heart he is really “an empty vessel and ‘a soft man'” (April 4, 2014).
“Given Ms. Robinson-Regis’s desire to promote the virtues of hardness and men of steel, the use of Penguin’s ‘Soft Man’ seemed appropriate for the occasion…. It celebrates patriarchy at its worst and enthrones sentiments that our nation can do without at this stage of our development.
“In ‘Soft Man’ Penguin tells us that a woman likes a man ‘who lays down his turf, a man who can stand up straight.’ He says further ‘a man is supposed to lead/ supply his woman’s needs/Never make the yard get weeds/Dig the soil and plant the seeds.’
“Just in case a woman ever forgets her place in this hierarchy of power, Penguin reminds her that man lays down the law. He says: ‘A man should be like a tower/Protect his household at any cost/He got to show strength and power/ and show that he is the boss.’
“These sentiments embody a message that might have been the prevailing wisdom 30 years ago. They have no place in our society today. When that calypso was written, most of us accepted a society in which men were perceived as primary authority figures in the household, in the political arena, and God’s appointed rulers in the vineyard. Such a world privileged male power, which, by definition, relegated women to a subservient role in the society….
“How relevant are such attitudes in 2014 where women are trailblazers in so many areas and there is so much violence in our society-in our schools, homes, and communities, with much of the violence directed against our women. Can it not be argued that the values inherent in ‘Soft Man’ promote a misogyny that is unhealthy for our society?
“I know that Ms. Robinson-Regis would say that she did not intend to denigrate women and perhaps such excesses are excusable in a political context. However, when one sees how some of our ministers treat their constituents (observe the endorsement of such behavior by an organization that is supposed to be working to uplift women), one can safely say that we are dealing with a structural problem that transcends party lines.
“The newspaper article suggests there was audience participation in Ms. Robinson-Regis’s misogynistic posturing…. After Ms. Robinson-Regis declared Dr. Rowley a man of steel, ‘Soft Man’ was played; the audience sang aloud with it, and then shouted the names ‘Faris and Hinds.’ Ms. Robinson-Regis informed them that as far as she knew, they, too, were men of steel. As Penguin asserted, and presumably Ms. Robinson-Regis concurs, a soft man ‘could never get women’s respect/Everybody does call him stupidy….’
“The messages that we send to our youths can be very powerful especially when they are enmeshed in popular culture. The struggle for women’s dignity and equality should remain paramount in our party and our society. Something has to be terribly wrong when after 30 years we are still sanctifying sentiments that we thought we had long ago abandoned….
“We all need to be extremely careful about the language we use…. As we watch the brutalisation of our society, the best measure of a man cannot be reduced to how hard or soft he is. A man’s hardness endures for a while. His character and respect for women should last a lifetime.”
It’s 2017, Keith Rowley is our PM but the denigration of women continues. We must be more conscious of how we speak characterize our women.
Next week I will examine the PM’s comment.
Professor Cudjoe’s email is email@example.com. He can be reached @ProfessorCudjoe.